Thursday, September 5, 2013

Buri nazar wale tera muh kaala

Who doesn't recognize these three words? If you've been leaving under a rock and this doesn't make any sense to you, tell me. I'll send a giant troll to smash you under the same rock.

It might be the weirdest topic to talk about but, hey! what's weird if it's makin yah happy as a bubble.. eh?

I had a special relationship with trucks right from my childhood. When I was a kid, I used to sit on the tank of my dad's motorbike. He used to make me read things written on the back of the truck to keep me awake, as, I use to see-saw horizontally over the bike. When I grew up, my dad taught me how the first two alphabets on the number plates of these trucks signify the state the vehicle is being registered in. I still couldn't go wrong on that. And as majority of commercial transportation in India is done through trucks, I was able to see every state's truck wobbling along the highways. And thus, begin my journey with this amazing machine, without which no highway in India would look complete.

I've been on roads so much that one of the most belonging feeling that I miss right now is the zoooom sound of the trucks you hear in the middle of the night when the silence peeks in. The loud garbage trucks of California in the early morning makes me crave for the sweet trail of noise, a heavy truck leaves behind.

What have I seen in/on those trucks? Bizarre things. Everyone is aware about the spunky and perky quotes the drivers write on their trucks.
Scroll down to the comments to read the quotes. Translating them would kill the fun but, I'll be happy to translate if anyone feel the need to have a laugh or two.

The trucks are normally seen with two people. The driver and his side kick. Yes, let's call him the side kick. And when the three of them merges, fascinating things happen.

I have seen them, brushing their teeth and having a mini-bath in the seat, right in the middle of the highway during a traffic jam, I have seen the side kick putting sun glasses on the drivers head, I've seen them making tea right next to the steering wheel, I've seen them singing folk songs better than the ones we see on reality shows, I've seen mirrors, televisions, refrigerators, curtains, paintings, shelves, stereo system, fans, a life size cardboard cut out of Kareena Kapoor sitting between the driver and the side kick, a poster of Amitabh Bachhan, a 'welcome' mat near the driver's door, wind chimes and other such unique things which are least expected on a moving vehicle.
Epic. They are epic!

What I've seen behind the truck? Petrol, diesel, cotton, sugar canes, hay, tubes for drainage system, wooden logs, spare parts of airplanes and ships, cars, motorbikes, buffaloes, sheep, people, an elephant, chickens, stuffed sacs so overly loaded that the truck looked like a pug and millions of other crazy stuff. I also had this funny habit of stamping trucks with certain characters depending on their look.

Silly, huh?

They all have faces. Trust me.

The more I traveled, the more I was sure of some secret, unofficial competition going around between the truck owners. They decorate their trucks like a newly wedded bride and walk her on the highway ramp to check who has got the best.

On a serious note, people really don't realize the beautiful and intense art work that is crafted on such trucks. They really put in a lot of thought, time and sweat on decorating them. They cruise around with their trucks with so much pride, searching for jealousy in their rival's eyes. They spend, weeks and months and years on roads and their truck is their only companion during their vagabond journeys.
Exquisite art!

If I was the head of Pixar, to hell with Cars and Planes, I would make a movie called Trucks.

Tell me, I am not insane and it is normal to talk so much about trucks. Tell me, at least one of you who is reading this have also been enchanted with this super machine.

Actually, never mind.

I already feel it can be the best job in the world and if possible, I would be a truck driver. What better way to be on the roads 24/7, traveling east, west, north and south, stopping in the middle of the night to eat in cozy dhabas and drink tea in the middle of nowhere?
I already imagine myself, in a dhoti-lungi, raising my right leg up and patting it hard on the thigh and drinking lassi from a nasty glass.

So, never mind. I have already crossed the territory of saneness and it's impossible to get back to normal.


  1. Quotes on the truck - Take poison but, do not believe on girls, In trust we god, No gaarlfrand - No tenshan, Main bada hoke truck banunga (Because it's a tempo), Use diaper at night (instead of dipper), Buri nazar wale tera beta jiye-bada hoke tera khoon piye (an epic twist to the usual quote), Jahaaz ka beta, I just repeated that one-duh, Dhire chaloge toh phir milenge-tez chaloge toh Haridwar milenge, Buri nazar wale tu sau saal jiye-tere bacche daru pi pi kar mare, E malik kyu banaya gaadi bananewalo ko - ghar se beghar kar diya gaadi chalanewalo ko(emotional one), Sher ka baccha-ek hi achha.

  2. Lol... Gud one but too short ... Write sum more in it!!!

    1. I wrote a lot but, with the pictures it got too lenghty. So I deleted a lot of lines.
      May be 'Buri nazar wale tera muh kaala - part 2' lol

  3. Such an entertaining post. Lucky you, all through my life I have seen only the boring mining trucks fully covered in brown dust. :-|

    1. Haha.. Actually, the pictures were from Google but, I wish I had a picture of every truck I really saw. Those were stunning too.

  4. Count me in on this insanity radar :D

    Travelling from the city where we lived to our village, watching trucks were my treat for the 4-5 hours journey.
    The quotes up there are epic! Haha. I really loved this post!

    1. Yay! Finally found someone. That was a relief.
      Thank you.

  5. So, back with a bang ? :)
    I just loved the ride on the trucks :D
    That was one awesome post :)
    even though it is in a humorous vein, I can see there are lots of emotions attached to it :-)

    That dhoti-lungi-drinking lassi dialogue was awesome ;-)
    And what to say of the wonderful quotes :D :D
    And the wonderful spellings make them even more laughable :)

    Cheers :)

    1. I don't consider this a bang but, yeah! Something like that.
      Yes. I have a very special attachment to everything that moves on roads or tracks.
      haha..exactly. The spellings, the grammar and the punches.

  6. Hi dhara,

    I have just activated an email link for the blog :)

    Thanks ! See you soon !!

  7. Very entertaining and humorous. Glad you live in our neighborhood, the Bay Area.

    1. Hello neighbor! Yay! for the best place to be at.
      Welcome to my blog.

  8. Too good Dhara! Loved it:) All the truck wallas will become real happy if they read this!

  9. hahaha!! good one! Loved the quotes, and the pictures. "Bada hokar truck banker" is the best :-)

    1. oh! and the "Use diaper ant night" too :-)

    2. Ahh.. you are back. Missed thy comments.
      You bet. They are always hilarious. Hahaha..

  10. Hahaha...lovely and sort of nostalgic snippets of India...and how can you forget to mention epic "Hum do hamare do" consel ;)

    1. Actually, "Hum do Hamare do" is not just restricted to trucks. They are everywhere, specially on the walls of urinals. Hahaha..

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