Gone are the days, when people use to settle for schools or employers in their own city, no matter how defective they were. Students, salaried employees and professionals are now traveling around everywhere, to find the best. And everything is golden about those opportunities, until the time comes to find a place of our own, cook our own food and make our own bed.
It sounds childlike however, it IS a big deal. People get homesick and depressed and find themselves lost in managing a life outside their home. Many of them give up and go back to pavilion.
I was out of my house before I turned 18 and have never been home permanently since then. It has been eight years now. I had my own share of troubles, ill-management, depressions, home-sickness and failures but, I feel proud of my decision of choosing to live an independent life, which if I hadn't, I wouldn't be the person I am right now.
So, here is a small helpful guide for everyone who is going to or are already staying away from their family. At least some of these would surely help you down the road.
1) Make your peace with your roommates and landlord - Only if you are born with perfect karmas and glittering luck, you might end with perfect roommates. It all feels easy and smooth like butter in the start but, as time moves on and the habits and attitude of your roommates or landlord starts to surface, you start feeling strangled. You suddenly become capable enough to create a massacre. Even your tightest friend can turn out to be a worst roommate.
Solution? Make your peace with it. Everyone is different. Everyone's habits are different. Make yourself adaptable and flexible as much as you can. Ignore if you can't explore.
Just thank the lord, you don't have him as your roommate
2) Learn budgeting- The concept of being a king for the first fifteen days and a beggar for the last fifteen is not new to anyone, be it a student or a salaried employee . I was never able to do budgeting and that is why I know the consequences. Trust me, they are not pretty. Unless you want to survive on Parle-G and a teeny-tiny cup of tea, during the last week of the month, don't go on spending like a millionaire during the first two weeks. That goes specially for students who live on pocket money. Plan out your month according to your needs.
3) Deal with homesickness - This symptom differs from person to person. I use to get homesick, a lot. Do not let that feeling overcome you because, once you head towards your home, it takes a long time to get back on track. You spend hours on traveling, you get lazy, you extend your vacation and when you come back, everything seems much worse. And you are back to stage one.
Instead, use the technology. Call your family, Skype with them or text them. Make good friends but, avoid traveling to your nest every time you get homesick.
4) Get a vehicle - If you are going to stay in the same city for a long time, invest a little and get a vehicle. A simple moped would work too. You cannot imagine the terror of auto rickshaws and taxis. They make you beg and beg until you get on your knees and act as if you are paid to hire their three-wheelers. Plus, in a way, your own vehicle would be cheaper too, unless you spend your whole day driving around the city for fun.
5) Keep a safe back-up contact - At least have two to three responsible and reliable local numbers in your phone contacts. You might never know when you get hit by a car or catch malaria. And in a place unknown, it's a perk to know reliable people, whom you can call in the middle of night, in case of emergency. Don't be an ass and remember them only in emergency. Try to help them too, in your possible way.
6) Don't repel from your faculties, classmates, boss or co-workers - Like it or not, they are your family, away from family, even if you think they are mean or unfair. Mingle with them, try to know them and express yourself too. Create a bond and you might just build a whole new family there. This will also help you in dealing with homesickness. Of course there are people who cannot be pleased. In that case, follow our old rule - Ignore if you can't explore.
7) Stack up snacks - DO NOT and I cannot emphasize enough but again, DO NOT say no to those yummy home-made snacks your mom packs up with your luggage. You can never trust those untimely hunger calls from your tummy. There is no nightmare, like waking up super hungry in the middle of the night and having nothing around to eat. Stack up food like rats and ants, once you are away from home.
8) Learn to cook - And with that, I don't mean cooking Maggi. If you have a stove available, cooking is an extremely helpful option. I know, everyone is too busy to be cooking for themselves but, no matter how much finger-licking food is available at a cart near you, one time or the other, you ARE going to crave for healthy, homemade food. Your cooking skills would come in handy, then.
9) Be healthy and wise - The hectic hostel-like life makes us heavily addicted to tea and caffeine. I was a hopeless addict too but, try to control your urges. In long term, they ruin more than they help. And while we are at it, keep every addictions in control, be it drinking or any buck wild amusements you have to entertain yourselves. Be civilized. You don't want to wake up half naked on an unknown street of the foreign land.
10) Be nice - Now, this fairly depend on your character but, being nice won't hurt. Help others. Buy your roommie a lunch when he/she is out of money or help someone move or drop a colleague when he/she is in need or help your classmates with projects. These small things doesn't cost you much but, would surely turn you in to a much nicer person and people would look after you too.
11 ) Be safe - Don't forget you are at foreign place. You might not know all the people or all the localities like you know of your hometown. So, don't try to get all batcrap crazy and take patrol in the middle of night, thinking everything is okay. Times have changed and nothing and nowhere is safe. Take preventive measures, ALWAYS! (specially females)
12) Don't be a cry baby - Yes, don't be a cry baby. I get it that you are away from your home and you had to iron your own shirt and no one cares about you, and you are forever alone and you had to eat bread and butter for dinner and you cannot recharge your cell phone with negative amount in your bank account and no one invites you to the cool parties and you cannot pass a week without repeating a t-shirt but, that doesn't mean you drive on the road to self pity. You are in a barrel, above people who cannot afford to study in a different town, above people who cannot leave their home to work outside because of too many responsibilities, above people who weren't brave enough to come out of the comfort of their homes to fight challenges in the outside world. So be proud of that and try to see the brighter side of the story. Find hobbies that would help you divert your mind from unnecessary issues.
*) Lastly, do not forget your purpose of being there. You do not want to go through all the things above and then end up with nothing in your hand.
The reason, I wrote all this - I would have lived a lot differently if someone would have handed me this list, 8 years ago.
Learning the hard way is fun too so it's okay to break these rules once in a blue moon after all, life is all about making the most out of it.This time of our life, however much bitter-sweet they are, would never come back. Live it. Enjoy it. Fall and learn. And one day, you would surely quote Bryan Adams,